Reasons Your Wife Doesn't Want Sex. Remember when you and your wife were dating? It was really difficult to keep your hands off each other. You wanted her and she wanted you.
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That felt so good. It was awesome. There’s no better feeling than being desired.
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After marriage, and particularly after having kids, things have a way of changing. You are still ready to go every night, but she’s not. What happened? You feel like you rarely have sex anymore, and when you do it feels like she’s doing you a favor.
You work out, you look good, but it doesn’t make a difference. You’re lost. This whole married sex thing was supposed to be different. Couples counseling might be something to consider for deeper insight. However, these 5 Reasons Your Wife Doesn’t Want Sex will help you understand and show you what to do.
She Doesn’t Feel Connected to You. While we feel more connected to our wives by having sex, our wives need to connect first. You may have talked with her about daily logistics or superficial things. She needs more. She wants to be seen, heard, and known. The disconnect causes her loneliness. It’s like she’s trapped in a dungeon alone. You need to free her. Action: Talk to her about her.
Find out how she is feeling, her insecurities, fears, and struggles. Also, share how you are feeling. Look at her–no distractions. Get tunnel vision for her. Clear the mechanism.”2. She Doesn’t Feel Sexy.
Her body has changed since having kids. She knows it and she probably thinks about it all the time, constantly comparing herself to other women. Even when she returns to her pre- kid body, I guarantee she’s still comparing–desperate for affirmation.
The best place she can get it is from you. Action: Affirm her. She needs to feel your passion for her in your words, body language, and eyes. Tell her she’s sexy and why—particularly when she makes a negative comment about herself. When you get home from work, greet her with a long hug and kiss before you greet the kids. Look into her eyes and don’t be in a hurry to look away. When you’re out, direct your eyes to her rather than other places.
Give her a look that communicates, in a room full of people, she’s the only one you want to talk to. Studies show that over the course of a relationship, a woman’s desire for sex decreases while her desire for tenderness increases. The problem is that our desire for sex stays just as high as always. Even at its highest state, her appetite might not have been as high as yours and probably never will be. Action: Recognize this reality and be patient with her. Reach out to her with physical and emotional tenderness. That’s what she wants and needs.
Try to meet her needs before your own. She is Tired, Stressed, or Depressed. Motherhood is exhausting, emotionally draining and stressful. Once again, depending on the depth of her anxiety and/or depression you may want to seek counseling. Action: Give her some rest. Take the kids out for a day, run some errands for her, or clean the house.
If she is stressed or depressed, rub her shoulders without her asking you. Give her a foot or full body massage. Tell her to kick back and relax.
Give her music to listen to and light some candles. Take her tension away. She’s Focused on Being a Mom, Not a Wife. Women put a lot of pressure on themselves to be the perfect mom–to have it all together. They beat themselves up for every little mistake or lack of knowledge. They compare and can obsess on eliminating imperfections.
Sometimes our relationship as husband and wife gets lost. That’s not good. Your intimate relationship is important and needs her attention too.
Action: You need to talk to her about how you feel. However, make sure you are not prosecuting or pressuring her. Encourage her about how amazing she is as a mom. Let her know though that you miss her, want her, and desire her. It might even be okay to use the word jealous here. Your biggest concern should be for more intimacy–a significant need for each of you.
Mary Cooper | The Big Bang Theory Wiki. Mary Cooper. Occupation. Church employee. Mary Cooper is the mother of Sheldon Cooper, George Cooper Jr. Missy Cooper and wife/widow of George Cooper Sr.
She is a devout born- again Christian from East Texas. Her husband passed away many years ago. She is also the grandmother of Missy Cooper's son and the sister of Carl and Edward. Overview. Season 1.
When Sheldon is fired for disrespecting his new boss Dr. Eric Gablehauser, Mary comes to help after being called by Leonard when he resorts to odd activities to pass the time.
At first, she tries to coax him to apologize to his ex- boss, but finally tells him off about his superior attitude and forces him to go apologize. She goes with him and Sheldon's boss, Doctor Gablehauser admittedly develops an attraction to her (she quickly points out her husband is dead). Sheldon ends up getting his job back without really apologizing. Season 2. Mary is absent in all episodes of Season 2, but was mentioned a few times. She was mentioned in "The Panty Piñata Polarization", when Sheldon banishes Penny from the apartment. Leonard, who witnessed the whole incident, decides to put an end to this war by giving Penny what he describes as Sheldon's Kryptonite: his mom's phone number.
Sheldon's mother suddenly calls him and reprimands him about his behavior with Penny, she also tells him to apologize to Penny. In "The Maternal Capacitance", when Leonard's mother Beverly visits and she goes to the toilet, Leonard and Sheldon discuss their mothers and after Sheldon expresses admiration for Leonard's mother, he reveals that Mary once hit him with a Bible because he wouldn't eat his Brussels sprouts. Leonard says that Sheldon doesn't give his mother enough credit and that she's warm, loving and doesn't glue electrodes to people's heads to measure their brain waves while potty training. Season 3. Sheldon goes to his hometown of Texas when he and his friends' damage his career.
She welcomes him back, though she starts to irritate him with her religious quirks. The guys show up to take him back and he agrees only when his mother starts up again with her religious beliefs on evolution. She admits to being happy he is leaving, commenting, "Don't tell me prayer never works!". Season 4. Sheldon meets a new friend named Amy, who is the female version of him. They have a falling out when they disagree on whose career is better and Sheldon lapses into an odd depression where he buys multiple cats. Mary comes and tricks the two into making up by using reverse psychology: she makes it seem she is happy the two split up and they rebel by mending their friendship.
Season 5. Mary comes to visit her son, but ends up spending more time with his friends. She chooses to accompany his friends on a sightseeing trip of Hollywood rather than go with Sheldon to a lecture where he wants to embarrass Saul Perlmutter and cook the meals that Sheldon wants her to prepare. Annoyed, he goes with Amy, but catches a cold when it rains.
Becoming sick, Mary finally gives him attention and nurses him back to health. Season 6. Mary was absent in all episodes in Season 6, but was mentioned a few times. In "The Santa Simulation", it is revealed that her father died when Sheldon was 5 years old. At the Babybrook Mall in Galveston, Texas that same year, Mary dragged Sheldon to the mall and plopped Sheldon on Santa's lap and Sheldon said he wanted his grandfather back when asked what he wanted for Christmas, but this was denied and this became the reason that Sheldon hates Christmas.
She is mentioned again in "The Bakersfield Expedition" where a policeman asks Leonard, Sheldon, Howard and Raj if they need him to call someone and he guesses their moms, referring to Mary, Beverly, Mrs. Wolowitz and Mrs. Koothrappali and Leonard responds "Thanks. But we got it covered.". Season 7. She was mentioned in "The Raiders Minimization", Sheldon saying that she used to put hamster poop in his father'stobacco when he used to drink. Sheldon visits Texas when his sister is having a baby in "The Cooper Extraction". Sheldon talks with Mary on his webcam broadcast.
Mary is not seen on screen, only her voice is heard. In "The Mommy Observation", Sheldon surprises his mother with a visit and catches her having sexual relations with her boyfriend.
First, Sheldon condemns her for having coitus despite her Christian beliefs and she sends him to his room. Howard, who was in Houston lecturing, tells him how he drove away his mother's boyfriend and how she has been lonely ever since. Sheldon decides to not stand in his mother's way of happiness though he still chooses to condemn her internally. Also, he tries to have a talk with her about the birds and the bees. Season 8. In "The Maternal Combustion", Mary Cooper finally meets Dr. Beverly Hofstadter, Leonard's mother. The two very different women start out as civil, but later quickly come to clash as Beverly insults and belittles Mary strict religious beliefs, and Mary in turn derides Beverly's cold attitude.
Mary is especially insulted when Beverly is left dumbstruck how a genius intellect like Sheldon could be born to a woman like her. After taking a break from each other, the two come to terms with the argument: Mary decides to forgive Beverly for her offhandish ways, and Beverly realizes there is more than one way to raise a child. The two mothers make up and Beverly tries unconditional love by trying an awkward hug with Leonard. Season 9. In "The Matrimonial Momentum", Sheldon is in his apartment calling Mary after his breakup with Amy. He regretfully informs her that Amy broke up with him and that he would like to send the engagement ring (which is an old family heirloom - it belonged to his great- grandmother) back to Texas. She tells him not to be too hasty - his sister Missy is already married and Mary would rather Sheldon gave the ring to Amy than let his older brother George Jr.
Sheldon decides to hold on to it. She reappears in "The Convergence- Convergence" when Sheldon invites her to Leonard and Penny's re- wedding and without telling the bride and groom. She is picked up by Amy whom she is fond of and tells her to call her "Mary".
Mary is not pleased to meet Beverly again as they barely speak in the apartment. She also fights again with Beverly over the Bible.
Mary becomes quite taken with Leonard's father Dr. Alfred Hofstadter and they bond over their dislike of Beverly, his charm and his tolerance of others' beliefs and their admiration of each others' beliefs.
Both of them excuse themselves early from dinner and appear to be hooking up at their hotel to the discomfort of Leonard and Sheldon, and Penny's delight. Season 1. 0 In Mary's appearance in "The Conjugal Conjecture", it's revealed that she and Alfred merely had a simple conversation while at their hotel. Despite this, they still intend to see each other, much to Beverly, Leonard, and Sheldon's reluctance.
Mary consoles Amy when she mistakenly thought Sheldon would propose when he was giving a speech to Penny and Leonard. Afterwards, on the way to the airport, she teaches Amy how to make Sheldon treat her right. In "The Holiday Summation", Shamy visits Mary Cooper in Texas, where Sheldon is reluctant to tell her that they are living together due to her religious beliefs. Sheldon is surprised that she couldn't be happier for them and also learns that his mother thought he would never find anyone. He is even more peeved when Amy had told her of the living arrangements ahead of time. Sheldon goes off and rebels dressing like an idiot and getting an earring.
Mary makes him take it out. Amy also learns that even though Mary likes her, she does think that Amy is weird. Season 1. 1 She will reappear in the season premiere, The Proposal Proposal.
Physical appearance. Mary is an attractive, older woman with brown hair and blue eyes. She often wears dresses and necklaces in her appearances. Personality. Mary is very wise, intelligent, caring, kind, friendly, loving, and sweet- natured: she is very religious and at times, can be unwittingly bigoted - something Leonard occasionally has to point out to her. She appears to be an extremely good mother and is the only one who has ever been able to control Sheldon. Leonard describes her as Sheldon's "kryptonite". Sheldon describes Mary as being a "kind, loving, religiously fanatical, right- wing Texan, with a slightly out of scale head and a mild Dr. Pepper addiction". Sheldon also uses his mother to exact the point that he isn't crazy, as she had him tested.